CERTIFIED USELESS: 50 Distinguished Diplomas for the Modern Man. Hilarious Christmas Ideas for Men Who Have Everything & Adults Who Love White Elephant Gifts
Sale price
$14.99
Regular price $17.99
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Some men collect watches. Others collect tools they'll never use. Most simply collect distinctions they've never been formally awarded, until now.
CERTIFIED USELESS is a collection of 50 beautifully designed vintage diplomas honoring the modern man for his sustained excellence in selective hearing, strategic procrastination, confident wrong answers, and the timeless art of looking busy in meetings. Each certificate is illustrated in classic Victorian engraving style, with ornate borders, ornamental seals, and signatures from distinguished authorities such as Dr. Reginald Q. Whitford III, Director of Postponed Affairs.
What's Inside:
How to Use This Book:
Display the entire collection on a coffee table for guests to discover. Tear out individual certificates to award to deserving recipients. Frame your favorites. Regift them at parties. Or simply read the entire book in one sitting and nod quietly in recognition at each page.
These certificates carry no legal weight. They are not recognized by any university or government. What they offer instead is the only thing that matters: the small, dignified pleasure of being seen.
Scroll up and add CERTIFIED USELESS to your cart today, and finally give him the recognition he never asked for and absolutely deserves.
CERTIFIED USELESS: 50 Distinguished Diplomas for the Modern Man. Hilarious Christmas Ideas for Men Who Have Everything & Adults Who Love White Elephant Gifts
Sale price
$14.99
Regular price $17.99
The Perfect Gift for the Man Who Already Has Everything (Including Strong Opinions on Subjects He Knows Nothing About)
Some men collect watches. Others collect tools they'll never use. Most simply collect distinctions they've never been formally awarded, until now.
CERTIFIED USELESS is a collection of 50 beautifully designed vintage diplomas honoring the modern man for his sustained excellence in selective hearing, strategic procrastination, confident wrong answers, and the timeless art of looking busy in meetings. Each certificate is illustrated in classic Victorian engraving style, with ornate borders, ornamental seals, and signatures from distinguished authorities such as Dr. Reginald Q. Whitford III, Director of Postponed Affairs.
What's Inside:
- 50 unique full-page diplomas, each on its own tear-out page
- Five themed sections: Domestic Operations, Social Survival, Decision Making, Personal Maintenance, and Modern Life
- Authentic vintage academic design with frame-worthy quality
- Landscape format (8.25 x 6 inches), perfect for displaying or gifting
- Christmas gifts for husbands, dads, brothers, sons, and friends
- White elephant gift exchanges and office holiday parties
- Stocking stuffers that actually get a laugh
- Birthday gifts, Father's Day, retirement parties, and "just because"
- The man who genuinely has everything (except recognition for the things he shouldn't be recognized for)
How to Use This Book:
Display the entire collection on a coffee table for guests to discover. Tear out individual certificates to award to deserving recipients. Frame your favorites. Regift them at parties. Or simply read the entire book in one sitting and nod quietly in recognition at each page.
These certificates carry no legal weight. They are not recognized by any university or government. What they offer instead is the only thing that matters: the small, dignified pleasure of being seen.
Scroll up and add CERTIFIED USELESS to your cart today, and finally give him the recognition he never asked for and absolutely deserves.